Tuesday, March 31, 2015


Remorse, guilt, grief. And a sense of denial that have you hoping endlessly and with each waning day, dying little by little. 

My heart clenches each time I fling open the kitchen door expecting to see him sleeping in his cage. And each time, instead of Fluffy, I'll see that pesky white cat that usually comes to steal food and sleep with Fluffy in his cage. It's a nasty feeling, that crushing disappointment of thinking it's him. That glimpse of white fur, followed by dread and unmistakeable sadness. 

Fluffy is family. He's been with me for the past 12 years. I can't bear to give up hope so easily. It makes me think of those people who had family and friends aboard the 370. No body, no closure. What unspeakable suffering.

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

The Edge

Sharp, present and there
         A line stretched
         A straining eternity 
         An almost sound

Balanced, backed and waiting
            A collapse held
            A drawn halt
            A frozen want

The edge sits
       cruel and inviting.

Sunday, March 22, 2015


With a lingering touch to the upper arm, I tried to convey my understanding, my caring; and he turned, half-glancing over his shoulder, a brave smile (grief in his eyes), he says: Look after your cousin.

I smiled back, giving my assent, the ache in my heat throbbing.

God knows best. The affairs of the heart is His domain. I can only do so much and pray that only Good will succeed this anguish.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

What greater quest is there other than to pursue noble character. To be gallant, fiery and wry. I am in love with nobility. All ideas concerning it anyway. A whimsy of the mind. 

Thursday, March 5, 2015


What used to burn
        now expires
What used to want
        no longer desires

Night sky,
        you who hid my star
        what use have you of Starlight?
What was bright, my loyal might
          now buried,
          too far, too deep

The ashes fall, it settles
       nothing stirs
       no more